Welcome to Pypeline’s Week 1 College Football Top 10 Meme Rankings! All other polls pale in comparison. As part of our award-winning* coverage, each week we will rank the Top 10 memes in college football. How do we determine that, you may ask? Well, we basically throw darts left-handed at a dartboard while blindfolded carefully perform top level scientific analysis on a player/coach/fanbase’s memeability. And if you want in on the action, stay tuned until the end of the article. Or you can just scroll to the bottom. Either way. So without further ado, we present Week 1’s Top Ten College Football Rankings!
1. Herm Edwards
Sure Herm might not know what ASU’s mascot is. Or what size a jersey is supposed to be. Or possibly even what recruiting is. But he does know how to glare disapprovingly at you. And what more could you want in a coach?
2. Jim Harbaugh
There could be a little warmth under Harbaugh’s seat this year, if things go south for the Wolverines. No worries! Jim’s got himself covered. What better way to deflect attention from under-performing than hiring a shark humper offensive guru in the form of a shark humper Jim McElwain…. shark humper shark humper shark humper
3. Mike Gundy
The shocker of all shockers. Anyone who believed in true love had to be shook when they found out that Oklahoma St head coach Mike Gundy broke up with his mullet. It immediately became one of the Top 5 breakups of all time. The definitive list is as follows:
- Brad Pitt & Angelina Jolie
- The Beatles
- Detlef Schrempf & the Supersonics
- Mike Gundy & his mullet
- Taco Bell & that chihuahua
4. Handsome Will Grier
Mountaineers QB Handsome Will Grier is a prolific passer who is a dark horse Heisman candidate. He can do it all. Command the huddle. Run the West Virginia offense efficiently. Is able to run it when necessary. And can throw the ball…handsomely.
5. Larry Fedora
Never question UNC head coach Larry Fedora’s patriotism. He refuses to sleep at night knowing things like CTE are attacking the foundations of our country. But no worries, fellow Americans. You can rest easy, knowing that somewhere, Captain Fedora is fighting a concussion, knocking it out with his shield, and waiting for the authorities to show up, handcuff it, and take that concussion to jail, making the streets a safer place to buy groceries.
6. Alex Heismanbrook
It’s been a bit of a trend lately to give the Heisman trophy to the best player. But that seems a bit dated/prejudiced. What about all of the players who aren’t very good that also want to win the award? Does anyone ever think of them? Enter Wisconsin QB Alex Hornibrook. Correction: Alex Heismanbrook. A game manager’s game manager. Wouldn’t it be a nice change of pace for someone to win the award averaging <200 yds/gm, while bouncing 5 yard out patterns in the dirt? We say yes!
7. Lane Kiffin
Lane Kiffin. Aka Joey Freshwater. Aka the Lover from Lincoln. Aka Trap Money Freshy. He’s always got his game face on. Only we’re not talking about a football game, if you know what we mean. (wink, wink, nudge, nudge, nod your head, say no more.)
8. Florida Frying Pan Crew
As the old saying goes, “Don’t bring a knife to a gun fight.” As the new saying goes, “Don’t bring rocks to a frying pan fight, if that fight involves a local bookie nicknamed ‘Tay Bang.'” And the Gators took that saying to heart.
9. David Beaty
Has a coach ever been fired mid-game before? This season Kansas coach David Beaty will try to break new ground in that department. If he’s feeling frisky, he may try to even get fired mid-play. Now, THAT would be exciting. Jayhawk football: feel the electricity!
10. Genius Bryce Love
Stanford RB Bryce Love is a Heisman favorite. He’s the best athlete when he steps on the field. He’s also the one of the smartest athletes when he steps on the field. When he is not scoring TDs, he’s a human biology major & stem cell researcher. [insert joke about him dissecting defenses here]
Want to be a part of the magic meme-gic? Want to become the most famous person that you know that makes memes about college football? Well then, boy do we have good news for you! If you have an idea, a picture, see something, whether it be a coach, a player, or a fan, rival mascot, etc, that would make a great meme, contact us. Drop us a line on twitter, @Pypeline_, email us at info@thepypeline, post it on our chat, send it via snail mail, message in a bottle, whatever. We’ll give you full credit, no matter how big or small the idea. Just know that not participating in the meme rankings is a vote for communism and kicking small puppies.
